Managing Your Wedding and Your Relationships
The weeks and months leading up to your wedding is a blissful time, when everyone you know is so happy for you they support every decision you make. Right?
Everyone has an opinion, and some friends and relatives will share them freely, for better or worse. Thinking through the process and setting clear boundaries up front can go a long way toward preserving good relationships with those you love.
A bridesmaid, mother or recently married cousin can sometimes have an onslaught of suggestions. If it’s getting to the point where you screen your calls to avoid this person, find a way to give her energy a focus. Can she buy, measure, cut and tie the ribbons for all the party favors?
Future mothers-in-law can pose a special challenge. This is a new relationship for you both, so you don’t want it to begin on a sour note. At the same time, you may have your own mother’s jealousy to contend with as well as your own (perhaps heightened) sense of autonomy.
Realize that getting married means joining another person’s family. While you can’t allow your mother-in-law to become a dictator, you likely can find ways to make sure she feels included and heard. Give her the benefit of the doubt; she’s likely as uncertain how to broach a subject as you are. Consult her on those items from your to-do list that you’re less vested in, or that mean the most to her.
When you get especially aggravated, just stop what you’re doing and take a walk, mentally or literally. Think about how significant (or insignificant) the issue at hand will be five or 10 years from now. Your ultimate goal is to have a beautiful, enjoyable wedding that’s memorable for all the right reasons.